Texting while driving impairs your texting game (Satire)

by: Rodrick Joseph

We all do it. You’re driving down the road, trying to talk to your boo, and you’re having trouble texting because you just got a notification to turn left at the next intersection.  Driving is now the number one cause of misleading texts next to drinking.

Don’t text and drive. If you need to text, pull over to a safe area so that driving doesn’t get in the way of sending a great text. Even when you’re tweeting or social media-ing.  When you’re driving and using your phone, your quality of texting decreases greatly and it is a threat to the rest of us.  Using Siri doesn’t help either, she can’t understand half of what you’re saying since the radio HAS to be as loud as it can be.

Even with auto-correct, spelling errors and grammatical errors exponentially rise while driving.  You are at a high risk of coming off in the wrong tone, spelling something wrong (making yourself look dumb), not having the correct punctuation, or even the autocorrect correcting to the wrong word altogether.

This poor woman didn’t even see it coming.  She was texting and driving and ended up saying she was going to eat her Grandma and Grandpa instead of “meeting them”.


This guy below was just trying to spit some game.  Ended up looking like a complete and utter failure on the other end.  Driving got in the way of what this guy was trying to say.  Now, instead of being boo, he’s just another guy that was too busy driving to text back this girl.  6 months later.  Alan was put into the friend zone, never to be released.


So please next time you’re behind that screen, pull over so you’re texting game can be on point and not confuse the person(s) on the other end of the screen.  You’re loved ones worry about you, and that text could save a life. Pull over, think out your text/tweet and send it with ease knowing you weren’t distracted by driving.


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